Blackened Sunshine
by bipalium
Summary: The pain, it was so unbearable. It never hurt like that in battle, but now it did.


Hissing through his teeth as he felt an iron grip on his hair, Kakyoin braced himself and dug his fingers tightly into the couch he'd been bent over. Therefore, his head was forced up, neck bent in an uncomfortable, suffocating angle.

"Good grief, you're shivering," a dry chuckle brushed the redhead's neck.

A rough hand that had been clenching his wrists behind his back tightened dangerously. Kakyoin felt his hands going numb, fingertips prickling with lack of sensation. He kept his mouth silent, lungs tight as he held his breath. He wouldn't lament – he'd decided.

The pressure inside him rose as Jotaro drove his hips towards his own – weakened, trembling, slick with cold sweat. Biting his lower lip to block the noise in his throat, Kakyoin tensed – the conscious movement of resistance for which he had to concentrate greatly.

Jotaro tugged his hair harder, lifting his chin further up and leaning in to bite his earlobe. His teeth were hungry; they might've ripped the redhead's earring off easily. Jotaro sucked on bloodthirstily, and ravished the man's ear violently with his tongue. His slick, hot abdomen pressed firmly to the redhead's immobilized back, Jotaro withdrew his cock slowly – Kakyoin felt a shiver running down his spine – and ceased for a small yet so painfully long moment only to slam in back. Rapacious, quick, heavy.

"_Jotaro__.__" __The__ redhead leaned his elbows over the rail of the balcony, watching over his shoulder __as__ the black haired guy __inhaled__ a deep drag from his cigarette. The dark eyes shot him a short glare before resuming __observing__ the sunset. _

He ignores me,_ played repeatedly in Kakyoin's mind. It didn't seem like __the__ right time to talk, but with Jotaro __the__ time never was right. _

"_It's so beautiful here," the red haired guy uttered, yet without looking at the scenery. His eyes were locked on his shoes, and he'd be damned if he didn't want to quit talking right now and give up forever. Trying hard not to look or sound pathetic, Kakyoin eased his posture as much as he could. Except for, his muscles were so __tense__ that relaxing them only meant shaking like a kid before his first exam. _

"_Uh-huh," Jotaro grumbled through his cigarette. _

_Letting out a small, shaky breath, Kakyoin threw his head back. _Easy, smooth, _he inwardly bolstered himself. _

"_I wonder if it's even hotter in Cairo__.__" __The__ redhead forced a small smile, glancing cautiously at his companion. It wasn't a surprise to him that not a fracture of muscle quivered on Jotaro's everlastingly blank expression. _I can't believe I'm even bothering_, Kakyoin_ _sighed mentally. _He's so obviously half-hearted, if not to say heartless sometimes... Perhaps it's the exact reason.

"_How's Polnareff doing?" the black haired guy broke the silence out of the blue. _

_His eyes widening ever so slightly, Kakyoin stared at Jotaro, uncomprehending._

"_He looked so forlorn, if not to say absolutely broken." His cigarette wiggling between his teeth slightly, the black haired guy looked to the side, and then his eyes shifted __to__ Kakyoin's face. "Shouldn't we tell him?"_

"_We'll tell him sooner or later anyway," the redhead uttered, his voice uneven with a note of telltale surprise. "His mouth is too big, you know."_

"_He cried like a baby, didn't he?" Jotaro's eyebrow arched slightly as he peered at Kakyoin, eyes serious and judging. "He's very honest with his emotions, so I really believe he cares."_

Honest with emotions, that's what you call it_,__ Kakyoin felt himself wincing as he withdrew his eyes away from Jotaro and to the floor. _

"_You should go and cheer him up," the black haired guy chuckled without __amusement__. _

"_I'm not a babysitter__.__" Kakyoin glared at him shortly, and his eyes froze __on__ the man's face. In the mild bronze sunrays__,__ his small smile was so inviting, so irresistible. His face was quite close to Kakyoin's, and the redhead didn't have a chance to think it over before he cast his gaze and leaned in to Jotaro._

_He didn't know how to kiss properly, and it wasn't long before his mind was set into panic when his lips met Jotaro's. What was worse__,__ the black haired guy, surely not expecting such __an__ assault, didn't even close his eyes. But he didn't stare whatsoever, he just looked into Kakyoin's eyes with zero expression in his own._

_Pulling his lips away__,__ the redhead jerked his head back, his hand __rising__ to his mouth. It was dry__,__ but the warmth of Jotaro's skin lingered on his lips. _

_He ruined everything. Feeling his face burning red in embarrassment, Kakyoin backtracked slowly, avoiding Jotaro's eyes by any means. The moment was just so wrong and he stupidly made a fool of himself by letting his emotions run away with him in __the__ rush of __the__ moment. He made a terrible mistake__,__ and it was better to retreat and drop out of Jotaro's sight for as long as it'd be possible. _

_But before Kakyoin was ready to dash away from the sunbathed balcony, a hand came to his shoulder, fingers clasping it gently._

"_Was it... your first?" Jotaro muttered quietly. _

_Not daring to raise his face to look at the man he loved, Kakyoin nodded slowly. Jotaro's hand crept up to his chin, forcing him to look up__,__ surprisingly lightly. _

"_Then let's make your second more proper," the black haired guy whispered before Kakyoin felt heated __breath__ on his face and a slick tongue parting his lips. His chest swelling, knees numbing, he threw his arms around Jotaro's broad shoulders. The world __spun__ around him under his closed eyelids, and he couldn't care less._

Jotaro thrusted, pumped, fucked him hard and ravenous. In front of Kakyoin's closed eyelids the red was pulsing, and all that he could think about was pain. The pain, it was so unbearable. It never hurt like that in battle, but now it did. No matter how much the redhead tried to relax and lean into the touch, to buck up, to make Jotaro feel good, it was all about the pain. It was like his blood was intoxicated with deadly poison that sunk into his muscles and turned them into aching knots.

Agonizing surreptitiously, Kakyoin still kept his voice deep down in his throat. It was choking, he wanted to cough, to scream at the top of his lungs, just to let the air out along with all his desperation. But he couldn't make a fool of himself in front of Jotaro, so he held his emotions locked, enchained tight in his suffering heart.

The grip on his hair suddenly weakened and Jotaro's wild pace ceased. Squinting his eyes shut, Kakyoin prepared to be yelled at. Most likely, the black haired guy couldn't come when his partner was not better than a stone wall. And oh how much he wished he could ease up and take all the pleasure that was given to him. To make Jotaro feel good, to make his lover believe how much Kakyoin treasured him, how he wanted to let the heat that'd been burning in his chest flow out and shower his dear Jojo with warmth. Regrettably, Kakyoin didn't know how to express that oceanic emotion.

"What's wrong?" a whisper came close to his ear. Having been restrained like a clot of nerves, Kakyoin had not instantly noticed Jotaro had been tracing his neck with small, dry kisses.

"Nothing," the redhead muttered hoarsely, his voice thick after a long lack of usage.

Sharp pain pierced through his lower body and he almost screamed but managed to shut his voice in his mouth. The feeling of loss following, Kakyoin then realized that the pain was caused by withdrawal.

"Let's go to sleep, it's late." Jotaro patted his shoulder and straightened. The rustle of his bare feet over the floor subsided not long after he walked off.

_He doesn't like me__,_ Kakyoin thought, curling up on the couch, listening to the noise of water that started from the bathroom. A sob he'd desperately been trying to suppress broke free from his throat, his mouth writhed, tears flowing down his face. He couldn't fight them anymore.

* * *

><p>Jotaro wrapped a towel around his hips, wiping the misted mirror to look in it. A deep frown was imprinted into his forehead like into a stone statue. Sighing, he rubbed his eyes sleepily and left the bathroom.<p>

In the hotel room that was overflowed with silver moonlight, Kakyoin had fallen asleep right on the couch. Curled up into protective ball, he was disturbingly soundless. His striped pajamas were fixed as if the black haired guy hadn't almost ripped them off the other man just a half an hour ago. What a foolish gesture it was back then.

Brushing the back of his hand over the redhead's cheekbone, Jotaro flinched slightly. Kakyoin's face was moistened and cold, as if he cried himself to sleep. And he apparently did, while Jotaro had left him there all alone.

Running a hand through his hair and stopping it to rub his eyelids, Jotaro grinded his teeth. He never meant it. He never wanted it to be this way. But what he was doing wrong was also unreachable. He couldn't grasp the reason why Kakyoin eventually turned cold towards him in just several weeks after that fateful evening, he just suspected it was his own fault. Jotaro felt it with his skin, as if the answer was right there, but he wasn't able to see it.

Lying down at the couch, the black haired guy leaned over Kakyoin's neck and carefully placed a kiss to his cheek. Kakyoin's soft, cherry-scent hair tickled Jotaro's nose when he pressed his stomach to the man's back, his face to the redhead's neck, his body taking the pattern of Kakyoin's curled posture. The redhead's breathing was steadily making the other man sleepy with its slow rhythm. Wrapping one arm around Kakyoin's waist, Jojo listened to the quiet breaths of the man he loved. Not long before his eyelids grew heavy Jotaro felt Kakyoin's stiff position ease and soften towards him. Smiling into the red hair, Jotaro let the slumber overcome him.


End file.
